User Profile

It struck me recently that I'd had the same fairly nondescript profile description up for nearly the entire six and a half years I've been keeping this blog. I resolved, therefore, to bring it more up to date, as well as make it more informative. Unfortunately, while trying to mentally compose some sort of universal means of introducing myself, I came across two problems:

1) I don't believe in such a thing as static identity; we all grow and change, and both our self-perception and others' perceptions of us are consistently evolving, and

2) I feel like I'm the least-qualified person in the world to talk about myself, as I can only give my self-perception - which is great for me, but probably not going to be that handy for other people looking to get to know me, as I'm far too close to my subject to provide an accurate description.

So, here's how I see myself: twentysomething nearly-married woman; fairly intelligent with a tendency to (over)analyze and find the patterns and connections that make up the bigger picture; a bit on the literature/gaming/sci-fi geeky side with a deep and abiding love for a well-told story in any form, a definite exhibitionistic streak, an appreciation for almost all forms of art, and a great love of performing, especially in the music and dance arenas. My two biggest fears are losing financial security and never having the energy/time/opportunity/bravery to really pursue performing; much of the tension in my life lately has come from the conflict between the two.

I'm told by other people that I come across as clever, a bit geeky, gorgeous, and intelligent; also that I can be prickly, impatient, intolerant of others' shortcomings, self-absorbed, and overbearing. I would probably vouch to the truth of most of that, although I would like to add that one of the things I believe strongly is that the only thing we can control in life is ourselves, and therefore my impatience with people stems not from their shortcomings necessarily as my perception of their unwillingness to do anything about them.

Perhaps somewhat ironically, then, my biggest belief is in flexibility in one's beliefs. One of my formative experiences in the subject came from a scene in Kevin Smith's Dogma, when two characters have a conversation as to the advantages of having ideas instead of beliefs (the idea being that, when presented with conflicting evidence, it's much easier to change or modify an idea than a belief). I wouldn't say I have unshakable faith in any subject, except perhaps that nothing is permanent. My ideas, however, tend toward the liberal and humanistic side. I prefer dealing with the practicalities of life here and now than debating the existence of a supreme being or afterlife. I value compassion but recognize the necessity of an impartial legal system. I think government should act as a check against human failings (especially greed and xenophobia). And in the end, I think the only - and the harshest - judge we have to answer to is ourselves.

Friends Policy: I would not post my journal publicly if I didn't want people to read it. Therefore, if you enjoy what I write, you're more than welcome to add me to your friends list. (I may or may not do the same; it's nothing personal either way, I'm just odd like that.) If you plan to comment regularly, feel free to introduce yourself; I'm always interested in where people are from and how they find me.

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